My dad just dropped a bowl of pasta on the floor and it went everywhere, and he stared at it for like 5 minutes, sighed and then said ‘sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead’ and then he walked off without cleaning it up.
I told my dad a post about him has nearly 40k notes and he told me that he doesn’t understand what ‘tumblrering’ is but he doesn’t want to be involved in my lonely shenanigans.
A guy I don’t know very well handed me his yearbook and asked me if I wanted to sign it.
I said yes, and shortly after he added, “Just don’t write anything gay.”
I wrote this:
Fuck my actual butthole. You are a boy and so am I. We are going to have sex that is gay. Pound my rock hard cock and bite me.
i’m that friend that has to walk behind the others when the sidewalk doesn’t fit a group of three
I think about this post a lot
wow why am i so stupid i literally didnt listen to ed sheeran for a year because i thought i was too cool for school and such a hipster but my soul is alight with this fucking beauty
That awkward moment when you ran up the stairs and now you’re trying to hide your heavy breathing like it’s no big deal but you’re actually pretty winded and dear god you need to work out.
the uglier the snapchat, the closer the friendship
a kid from my school just got expelled today for pretending to be russian for 8 months. he pretended he couldn’t read, write or talk english he did good in all his classes because he had all the teachers and principles convinced he just moved from russia, so they didn’t make him do any work